Your ATTN Please || Saturday, 12 April

I know we talk lots about personal brands, but let’s be clear: your favourite brands are NOT YOU.

In other words, you can’t buy personality. Yet still, so many use big corps as personal identifiers. Brand loyalty’s one thing, but blindly defending Apple or getting Disney tattoos? That’s a whole other beast. While brand fanaticism isn’t new, this recent uptick’s all about brands pushing products that don’t just suit you, but ARE you.

-Devin, Guest Editor

WHAT’S HAPPENING IN MARKETING TODAY?

Revived “Dire Wolves” have a downside, Bieber sets his brand ablaze & LeBron James Barbie doll

Why you shouldn’t buy the hype around “de-extinction.”

First the woolly-mammoth mice, now three fluffy white canines - Romulus, Remus, and Khaleesi - allegedly Dire Wolves brought back from extinction by Colossal Biosciences. Only, they’re not Dire wolves. And they haven’t been “de-extincted.”

According to Vox, these pups are “genetically modified, hybridized modern wolves, gestated in the womb of a domestic dog”, which doesn’t sound as cool. ‘Tis but a spectacle crafted by the company, who claim to have created the the world’s first successfully de-extincted animal, one “made famous from the HBO hit series Game of Thrones”.

The story highlights the dangers of online hype and these buzzwords we cling to. Plus, Colossal has now created a species outside of the natural order of things, that humans are now morally accountable for. But WTF are we supposed to do with these animals we’ve now created all just for the mere fact that we said we can?! The ethical and technical alarm bells are freaking RINGING my guy.

I would hate to think of what horrors have gone on behind the closed doors of Colossal Biosciences – but the more we feed the de-extinction hype train, the more we’re likely to see these cases pop up. I guess we have to ask, is it worth it for the potential to reverse critically endangered species? Do we have the right to do that? Where do we draw the line? 2025 – you’re looking more dystopian by the day.

Justin Bieber says you shouldn’t waste your money on his own brand.

The pop star has officially parted ways with his clothing line Drew House, announcing the split in a since-deleted Instagram story reading: “I Justin Bieber am no longer involved in this brand. Drew House doesn’t represent me or my family or life … If your rocking with me the human Justin Bieber don’t waste ur money on Drewhouse”.

I’m going to take a wild guess and assume this has something to do with the teasing of his new brand Skylrk. This kind of tiered, elusive marketing is always a hit, particularly when someone as big as Biebs does it, causing his millions of crazed fans to speculate and feed the hype machine until he drops basically ensuring instant success.

Last week, Justin uploaded an animated video to his insta of him riding a motorized scooter which he eventually ditches, a theorised reference to his severed relationship with ex-manager, Scooter Braun. The singer then sets fire to an apparent and very literal Drew House before strolling off into a new building representing Skylrk, alongside his wife Hailey and a baby stroller. I’m not sure what it all means really, but he sure knows how to feed the fans. Touché, Biebs.

LeBron James the GOAT becomes first pro male athlete Barbie doll.

That’s it.

That’s the whole story

-Sophie, Writer

DEEP DIVE

When brand becomes identity

I find it so strange when people introduce themselves with corporate affiliations.

“I’m a Glossier girl,” “I only wear Rick Owens,” “I can’t live without my emotional support Stanley Cup.” Girl… how much are they paying you???

If the answer is nothing, then STOP THAT. Over time, brand loyalty has morphed into personality replacement. But how has it gotten this deep? And at what point does devotion cross into full-blown identity crisis?

The personal brandification of… YOU.

Brands have shifted the focus away from producing things we like. Now, it's about becoming part of our personalities - becoming who we are. Social media, hyper-targeted marketing, and influencer culture have all fuelled this transformation. They've given brands new ways to signal identity, rather than just preference.

Wearing a certain logo isn’t just a fashion choice - it’s a declaration of values, status, and even belonging. “I only get my coffee from Dunkin’.” “I don’t just work out, I do Pilates at Equinox.” Every buy is a badge, every brand a tribe.

From fans to followers to fanatics to freaks

Obviously, brand loyalty isn’t new. But at some point, it stopped being about simply liking a product. Somewhere down the line, product love started resembling… worship? Kinda creepy obsessed vibes. People cry over Disney, camp out overnight for Supreme drops and treat Apple keynotes like some kind of freaky religious ceremony.

Take Tesla superfans, for example - defending the brand’s honour online as if Elon Musk's their bestie. Or the Swifties, who engage in digital warfare over any perceived slight against T-Swizzle and her actions.

Don't even get me started on brand tattoos. That's right - permanently inking McDonalds receipts, Harley Davidson logos, and Mickey Mouse (yes, he counts). Is this fandom or indoctrination? Or worse, is it literally looking into to the bleeding jaws of capitalism and saying “yes daddy please”?

How brands engineer devotion

Brands didn’t stumble into this cultification by accident - they very much built it. So, if you wanna play demon brand overlord, here’s the playbook:

(What? I never said I wasn’t evil.)

  • Exclusivity & scarcity – The more unattainable something is, the more people want it. Just like every person I’ve ever had a crush on (pardon the self-dunk). Limited drops, long waitlists, and VIP memberships all create desire through deprivation.

  • Community & ritual – A strong community fuels brand worship. Whether it’s Peloton riders hyping each other up to go nowhere (zing!), or sneakerheads dissecting the latest Nike collab.

  • Emotional connection – Apple isn’t just selling tech, it’s selling creativity. Disney isn’t just selling movies, it’s selling nostalgia and childhood magic. The best cult brands don’t just sell products; they sell feelings and experiences.

The good, the bad, and the existential crisis

On one hand, strong branding creates meaningful communities. But on the other, it makes people so emotionally invested that criticism of their favorite brand feels like a personal attack. We talk about parasocial relationships with influencers, but what with brands? Are we really choosing these brands, or are they choosing our identities for us?

For me, there’s one clear takeaway: building a brand that inspires deep loyalty isn’t about the product. It’s about the story people want to tell about themselves. But in a world where corporations feel like personality traits, it’s never not worth asking: who are we when we strip the brands away?

If that thought makes you uncomfortable, Then it might be time to log off, touch some grass, and drink water. That is, out of a discrete, non-branded cup, of course.

-Sophie, Writer

TREND PLUG

It's 5 o'clock somewhere!

In the 2019 psychological thriller Ma, main antagonist Sue Ann (played by Octavia Spencer) leaves out a box of booze for some soon-to-be teen victims.

While hiding nearby, she Facetimes them to say: "I was just thinking, why wait for the weekend? It's 5 o'clock somewhere!", followed by the screechiest, most maniacal laugh you've ever heard. Of course, our young protagonists don't pick up on how obviously evil she is.

Spencer's line, while unsettling, is still pretty damn funny. Not only has she given us a refreshing take on all the "wine o'clock" jokes your auntie blasts on Facebook, she's also gifted us the perfect sound bite for excusing all our dumb antics. Things like:

How you can jump on this trend:

Grab this sound and film yourself lip syncing the line. Slap on some OST describing a thought or situation where you're down to commit some nefarious deeds - no matter the time or day.

A few ideas to get you started:

  • When Friday drinks start at 4:30, but there's wine in the fridge at 2:30

  • When there's deadlines today but your workmate's got tea that's overflowing

  • How it feels stepping out for a vape 6 minutes before the most important meeting of the quarter

-Devin, Copywriter

FOR THE GROUP CHAT

😲WTF: 2000 FT HIGH BRIDGE
How wholesome: appreciate life.
😊Soooo satisfying: perfectly cut mango
🍝What you should make for dinner tonight: Cajun chicken baguettes

TODAY ON THE YAP PODCAST

Want even more “YAP”ing? Check out the full podcast here.

ASK THE EDITOR

I want to get my small business on Reels. Where do I start? -Melissa

Hey Melissa!

If you want to know what kind of brand content does well on Instagram, spend some time scrolling and pay attention to what is performing well. Check out the comments to see what kinds of conversations users are having.

Follow a bunch of people in your industry so you can see what they're doing. Pay attention to which of their posts get a lot of engagement and which ones flop. Then, look at what others in adjacent industries are doing and see if you can take any inspiration from their success.

That said, don't get stuck in analysis paralysis for too long! Once you've done a little homework, just start posting! It might take some time for your audience to find you, and that's ok. If you keep tweaking what you're doing based on the feedback you get, you'll eventually figure out what works for you.

- Charlotte, Editor ♡

Not going viral yet?

We get it. Creating content that does numbers is harder than it looks. But doing those big numbers is the fastest way to grow your brand. So if you’re tired of throwing sh*t at the wall and seeing what sticks, you’re in luck. Because making our clients go viral is kinda what we do every single day.

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